La Hermana

This week we celebrate Thanksgiving and for many of us, one of the things for which to be most thankful is family, especially our hermanas.

As writers, family, especially our sisters or women who we think of as sisters, can often form the basis for some very powerful stories. As Latino writers, incorporating such themes gives us an opportunity to share our diverse Latino cultures with others, but the key to doing so successfully involves walking a very fine line. Readers do not want to be beat over the head with a particular message, but do respond well to universal issues with which they can identify.

For example, many many years ago I rented THE JOY LUCK CLUB which was based on a novel by Amy Tan. The characters were Chinese and the movie (as well as the book which I later read) did a wonderful job of portraying Chinese traditions by subtly weaving the cultural aspects of the book with the more universal issues of second generation identity struggles, mother-daughter friction and sister/women friendships. By the end of the movie I was bawling, asking myself what would I leave my daughter of my culture and how I could be her friend as well as her mother.

The story in THE JOY LUCK CLUB succeeded because of the strength of the response roused by the universal issues of mothers, daughters and sisters.

A wonderful Latino story which also triumphs because of such elements is EVENINGS AT THE ARGENTINE CLUB by Julia Amante. When I had the opportunity to discuss the theme of family with Julia, she had this advice to offer aspiring Latino writers:

“Family shapes everything from what a character believes to what they will attempt to become (or fight not to become), and therefore in women’s fiction it’s crucial to see the impact of family on characters.”

Family, and sisters, plays an important role in our lives and in our fiction. Experiment with incorporating them in your writing, even in secondary roles. As Julia noted, the impact families make on our characters shapes them and will help demonstrate to the reader why a character makes certain choices. Including family in your writing will also help to share your culture with readers and hopefully help spread the word that we have a great deal in common in the issues we face in our daily lives.

A big thanks to Julia Amante for sharing her writing wisdom and also for offering a copy of EVENINGS AT THE ARGENTINE CLUB to one lucky individual. Just leave a comment on the blog for a chance to win an autographed copy of EVENINGS AT THE ARGENTINE CLUB.

Gracias por Nuestros Hermanas (y Hermanos!)

As we’ve reflected this month on what our sisters have meant to us (even if they were the nuns in the Catholic school we attended!), I think it appropriate this week (the week of Thanksgiving) to give our thanks for what our sisters have meant in our lives.

Our sisters have brought us both joy, and pain. Our sisters have been our support, and they’ve been a source of discouragement. Our sisters have been the light of our lives, and our darkness.

But regardless of what our sisters have meant to us, been to us, done to us – they all bring us learning and growth. Whether our sisters have been our closest allies – or our harshest enemies – they have touched those points of tenderness in our lives where we go into our selves to learn and grow.

I’ve received messages this month from women who have lost their sisters (and miss them greatly), as well as women who have expressed their deep hatred for their sisters and the angst they’ve brought to their lives. I’ve also received messages on the closeness of sisters, and how they’ve torn a family apart.

Either way, we cannot deny the import that sisters have had for us. And we can be grateful for them. Whether they taught us to grow by lifting us up, or taught us to grow by showing us that even those closest to us have to be shown the boundaries (especially in how we allow ourselves to be treated), we have gained immeasurably by having these unique beings in our lives.

And, lest I forget, our brothers (both familial or relational) also bring us equally strong and important lessons. Often the male friends, and our brothers, have likewise been a source of both pleasure and pain.

I have men friends that I turn to for advice and insight on the male of the species (especially when they’re particularly hard to decipher), and my brother is a very important person to me – as well as gifting me with a beautiful, kind and amazing sister-in-law, and three nephews.

Further, men don’t always reach out in their hard times, as we women often do, and they need to be remembered – both to be shown appreciation for what they do, and also to be given support when they’re going through a tough moment.

Let us be grateful for our sisters and brothers this week, and if we’re lucky enough to be physically close to them, reach out to give them a hug, a kiss, a word of thanks, or even just a prayer or blessing.

Our families – sisters and brothers – are part of what connects us, makes us a community and – good or bad – show us the most important parts of ourselves. El día de dar la Acción de Gracias is an opportune time to reach out and express what these important people have meant to, and brought into, our lives.

Thank you, herman@s!

November Latina Flick Picks

TORTILLA SOUP

This Mexican-American adaptation of Ang Lee’s EAT, DRINK, MAN, WOMAN centers on widowed chef Martìn Naranjo (Hector Elizondo) and his three adult daughters who live in modern-day Los Angeles.  All the characters come to crossroads in their lives, each yearning for change yet struggling to take action towards who or what they genuinely love.  Oldest daughter Leticia (Elizabeth Peña) returns to Christianity after heartbreak but finds herself longing for a more temporal kind of love.  Middle sister Carmen (Jacqueline Obradors) plays it safe in the gray areas of both her love romantic and professional world.  Youngest daughter Maribel (Tamara Mello) follows her impulses in an effort to run away from her late adolescent existential angst.  Furthermore, the film alludes to a sisterhood that extends beyond bloodlines with the character of Yolanda (Constance Marie).   As with all ensemble pieces, the fate of the group is as important as that of its individual members, and TORTILLA SOUP definitely ties up all the loose ends. Get your media journal, cue the DVD and reflect on this month’s theme with help from the following questions.

1.    Sisters can be very similar and quite different all at the same time.  How are Leticia, Carmen and Maribel unique from one another?  In what ways, however, are they all Martín’s daughters?  What are the things they have a common that seem to stem from the fact that they were born and raised in the same family? If you have female siblings, what personality traits do you share that you attribute to the fact that you were raised in a similar environment? How has each of you distinguished yourself from the family traits?

2.    Make a list of your closest female friends i.e. the sisters you have chosen.  Beside each name, make another list of the qualities you most appreciate about her. Now ask yourself what role does the family traits you reflected on in Question #1 play in your choice of sisters outside the family? That is, what characteristics do your closest female friends share with your family of origin? Which of your friends’ traits are you drawn to precisely because they’re the opposite of what is natural to or valued in your value?  Things to consider:  communication style, spiritual or religious beliefs, attitudes toward money or sex, political beliefs, approach to handling conflict, etc.

3.    Although they are all adults, Leticia, Carmen and Maribel each has at least one moment in the film when she has to assert herself with Martín? With which of these instances did you most identify and why?

4.    Maribel’s “big moment” also becomes a scene in where certain unflattering things are revealed about her two sisters.  Even though Leticia and Carmen resist in the moment, Maribel’s outburst becomes a catalyst for each to move closer to their heart’s desire. Thus, her decision to speak her truth actually helps sets her sisters free (even if they would have much preferred a less awkward wakeup call).  Have you ever had an experience when a sister (whether by blood or choice) revealed her truth in a way that exposed one of yours?  How did that instance compel you to make a necessary change?  Have you ever been that woman whose truth set another sister free?

5.     The Naranjo sisters do not seem to have other significant relationships with other women outside of each other and, for the most part, lead separate lives although they live under the same roof.  Furthermore, their lives outside the family appear centered on men (and not exclusively romantic interests).  How might some of their choices have been different if they had sisters outside the home?  For example, how might Leticia’s response to her breakup been different if she could turn to other women than Carmen or Maribel?

Latina Leadership Lessons: Why Are Powerful Latinas Happy?

Personal power, done right, is intertwined with personal happiness…done right. In other words, if power is benevolent, and if happiness is sought with the right frame of mind, the two will join hands and march forward together, making for a powerfully happy life, or a happily powerful one.

It’s simplistic. But the older I get, the more I realize that being happy is simpler than we think, and being happy increases our power. The “Powerful Latinas” featured in this website come from vastly divergent fields: arts, entertainment, business, government, military, health, etc. Not knowing them personally, I’m going to stick my neck out and fathom a guess about each one of them: They are happy in their lives.

The Connection Between Power and Happiness

Personal power, as I use it, refers to our individual ability to make a difference in the lives of others. All the Powerful Latinas highlighted in prior blogs have that ability and use it.

Happiness, as used here, refers to how we live our lives. It’s a process, not an emotion. We’ve all seen bumper stickers that say, “Happiness is the journey, not the destination.” Or, “You can’t find happiness; you create it.” It’s the same message. On my bulletin board by my desk, I pinned this little revelation a friend emailed me recently. Unfortunately, neither she nor I know the source of the statement, but here it is:

“If you pursue happiness, it will elude you. But if you focus on your family, your friends, the needs of others, your work, and doing the best you can, happiness will find you.”

It speaks straight to my heart!

Powerful Latinas have their focus in the right places: their family, their amigas and amigos, the needs of other people (neighbors, co-workers, supervisors, clients, patients, customers, fellow soldiers), their work, and—most tellingly of all—doing the best job they can do. This focus is what elicited their quality work, what earned them the recognition and prestige they have. This focus is what gave them their personal power and the ability to make a difference in the lives of others around them.

And, according to my bulletin board, this focus is bringing them happiness along the way.

~~~~~~

Note from Aurelia: I love Thelma’s premise that Happiness is a process, not an “end game” – think about what that means for your life…

Mi Hermanita: So Far and Yet So Near

She’s my kid sister, a generation younger, seven years that made our paths hardly cross as we grew in a chaotic family of eleven, counting mom and dad.

While I struggled with high school angst, she learned pencils and crayons and hopscotch.

My circle of friends was never a Venn diagram with hers, two orbs floating in spaces distinct from one another.

When I locked arms with my groom, she walked freshman hallways with trepidation, thin arms loaded with books and doubt.

As California beckoned and my first plane lifted me across the clouds, she slipped into a blue dress for her prom.

Babies swelled my belly twice, and her sailor husband kept her childless and alone while he navigated seas across the globe.

As my horizons spread like banquets before me, she went without work, without friends, without hope…
the years beating her spirit,
her husband stifling her soul,
her Texas town offering no options,
her body racked with disease.

1,500 miles stretch between mi hermanita  and me, fifteen-hundred years to overcome, fifteen-hundred tears to stem, so far and yet so near, so near and yet so far.

PowerfulLatinas.com contributing blogger Thelma Reyna addresses education, workplace issues, and topics related to this blog’s monthly themes. She’ll also write book reviews and occasional creative/literary pieces.

Latina Leadership Lessons: The Wicked Sister!

Although we count on our sisters for help, support, nurturing and guidance during the tough times (and here I’m using the word “sisters” to mean more than just those women related to us), not all of us have had the experience of having a close relationship with a sister. In fact, there are times when our “sisters” can be downright cruel.

I myself did not grow up with a sister. I have a younger brother and I was the older sister. And I will admit that I was not always the supportive, wise and mature role model I could have been… But, I mean, really now! Who can always be nice to an annoying little brother? Seriously, though, although my brother and I have a lovely relationship now, I was so excited to get sisters-in-law when my brother married (his wife and her sister are now both my “sisters”) because I wanted to have the experience of having a sister. And while the upside of having a “sister” is wonderful, the downside can be painful.

For example, when one goes in and out of the closeness of a relationship with a friend, it makes a difference if the separation takes place simply because you grew apart or moved away, of if, for example, there was some betrayal involved.

I have had friendships end in both ways. Sometimes you and the “best friend” you had growing up find you don’t have as much in common as you used to. However, I’ve also been betrayed by a best friend who decided she wanted my boyfriend as her own. That parting was much more bitter.

Why do we compete and/or compare ourselves to each other? As women, we should know better. As we all work to bring each other up, we all rise higher. However, I would be remiss to ignore the fact that sometimes we do inflict harm.

At the base, the competition or comparison comes from fear, a lack of self-esteem and a need to tear someone else down so we can feel better about ourselves. I know that for myself, when I find myself saying something catty in my head, I stop myself and say “she’s lovely – bless her!” It changes my attitude and helps me shift my energy away from tearing someone down to building someone up.

I’ll be the first to admit that I am FAR from perfect! And yet, I’ve been so blessed to have friends for a very long time. In fact, I still have close friends from middle and high school! These strong Latina women have been my “sisters” and have helped me through. Can you imagine where I’d be if I’d pushed them away out of some need to compete against them?

On the other hand, sometimes there are women from whom you need to distance yourself because their “friendship” does not lift you up. I had one friend who was very hurtful to me and I decided I needed to end the friendship with her. There was no big “proclamation,” I simply stayed away and we drifted apart.

So, do what you need to do to take the poison out of both yourself and whatever veneno that others want to inject into you! The mission of PowerfulLatinas.com is to lift other Latinas up. For example, at the upcoming ALPFA conference, I will be moderating a panel of Powerful Latinas to showcase their amazing-ness!

I love being around other wonderful Latina women — It makes me shine brighter, and I’m so proud of my “sisters”. And as a footnote, the woman who “stole” my boyfriend? Years later she later told me that she was jealous of me! Me?!? I was the geeky, nerdy, gangly one and she was the pretty, popular one. Just goes to show how confused we can get if we let our emotions keep us apart. I was surprised and it helped shift my perspective.

So let’s not be the “evil sister” nor allow ourselves to be the victim of others’ venom. Here’s to rising up together!

Sofia Quintero

A self-proclaimed “Ivy League homegirl,” Sofía Quintero, a writer, activist, educator, speaker and comedienne, was born into a working-class Puerto Rican-Dominican family in the Bronx. Sofia grew up in the same neighborhood as did Justice Sonia Sotomayor.

>> I talk with Sofia about growing up in her neighborhood, and what it was like at that time, from an ethnic standpoint, from a class standpoint, and from an educational standpoint.

After attending Catholic schools through 8th grade, Sofia then attended a neighborhood public high school that was known to be “rough.” Her older brother and sister, being much older than she, were not able to help with this transition.

>> Sofia shares with us what she learned from her different educational experiences and how she transitioned from one educational context to the next.

She earned a BA in history-sociology from Columbia University in 1990 and her MPA from the university’s School of International and Public Affairs in 1992. An unapologetic generalist who has worked on a variety of issues from fighting police brutality to defending multicultural education, Sofia was named by City Limits Magazine as one of the “New School of Activists Most Likely to Change New York.”

After years of working on a range of policy issues from multicultural education to HIV/AIDS, she decided to heed the muse and pursue a career in entertainment.

>> Listen to Sofia talk about her very interesting career choices prior to becoming a full-time writer AND how she made the transition!

Determined to write edgy yet intelligent novels for women who love hip hop even when hip-hop fails to love them in return, Sofía wrote her debut novel Explicit Content under the pen name Black Artemis. Explicit Content – the first work of fiction about female MCs in the hip-hop industry – was published by the New American Library/Penguin in August 2004. Booklist said of the novel Explicit Content, “Fans of Sister Souljah’s The Coldest Winter Ever (1999) will find this debut novel just as tantalizing. . .”

Her second Black Artemis novel Picture Me Rollin’ hit bookstores in June 2005. Bringing a fresh twist to the home-from-prison tale, Picture Me Rollin’ tells of the story of a young Latina whose obsession with Tupac Shakur leads her on quest to find self-love.  Black Beat wrote of Picture Me Rollin’, “Black Artemis has penned yet another piece of hip hop fiction that’ll have you at the edge of your seat ‘til the very last page.”

>> We discuss Sofia’s novels, her characters, and what people learn from her writing…

Amidst the controversy over the popularity of street lit, Sofía’s hip hop novels written as Black Artemis have been hailed by critics of all stripes – reviewers, educators and readers – for being as intelligent and substantive as they are entertaining and accessible. Her third Black Artemis novel Burn was published in August 2006. True to her mission to use hip hop as “edutainment,” Burn follows a bail bond agent in the South Bronx who – while searching for a missing graffiti artist – uncovers secrets and confronts her pasts.

Sofia’s fiction is taught on college campuses throughout the nation and across disciplines including John Jay, Fordham, Queens, Duke, Syracuse, and Wabash to name only a few.

>> I will personally vouch for her novels; I’ve read every one! They’re fantastic, with riveting characters. Hear Sofia talk about them, and make sure to pick up the books!

She teamed up with fellow hip-hop novelists E-Fierce and J-Love and social justice educator Marcella Runell Hall to co-create and publish Conscious Women Rock the Page: Using Hip-Hop Fiction to Incite Social Change. This multidisciplinary curriculum is based on three novels including Picture Me Rollin’ and contains thirty standards-referenced lessons to meet students where they are yet take them someplace better. CWRP has been hailed by social justice educators from middle school through college across the nation.

Sofia also writes contemporary women’s fiction under her real name. Her debut novella The More Things Change appears in Friday Night Chicas the first chick-lit anthology by and about Latinas. Her novel Divas Don’t Yield was published in March 2006 by One World/Random House and follows four diverse Latinas as they embark on a cross-country road trip from New York City to San Francisco, each packing a little more “baggage” than she thought.

She is also a contributing author to the anthologies Names I Call My Sister, Juicy Mangos, Politics Noir and Dirty Girls: Erotica For Women. In April 2010, Knopf will publish Sofia’s first young adult novel Efrain’s Secret about a Latino boy in the South Bronx who goes to extremes to realize his dream of going to an Ivy League college.

>> Stay tuned to the Powerful Latinas site as we tell you what’s coming up for Sofia in early 2010!

Sofia is also a screenwriter whose first feature-length screenplay Interstates won the 2001 San Francisco Black Film Festival screenplay competition as well as the 1998 Montage Entertainment Diversity in Screenwriting contest and was twice a semi-finalist for the screenwriting lab at Sundance. (The screenplay eventually evolved into the novel Divas Don’t Yield.) Her second screenplay- the baseball comedy M.L.B.- was a finalist for the ABC New Talent Development Award in 2003.

She has written and produced two short films that have screened at festivals worldwide: Corporate Dawgz – a comedic ode to White folks who “get” it – and the anti-romantic comedy Blind Date.

In 2001, Sofía co-founded the nonprofit organization Chica Luna Productions with friends Elisha Miranda and Sonia Gonzalez-Martinez. The mission of Chica Luna is to identify, develop and support women of color who use popular media to engage social justice themes and are accountable to their communities. The organization has two signature projects. The F-Word is a filmmaking institute for women of color where they not only learn craft but also build community and undergo political education. The Media Justice Toolkit is a collection of resources that both promote media literacy and encourage critical examination of depictions of women of color using popular media such as films like Set It Off and the television show Girlfriends to name just a few. In 2006, Chica Luna Productions received the Union Square Award for its visionary approach to using the arts to promote justice.

>> See one of Chica Luna’s latest projects by going here to read more.

With her dear friend and business partner Elisha Miranda, Sofía established Sister/Outsider Entertainment in 2006. SOE is a multimedia production company with several projects in development for television, film and stage. The foremost of these is the web series Sangria Street, a web series described as a Latina Sex in the City slated to launch in 2010. In July 2007, SOE premiered Pandora’s, a groundbreaking multimedia theater production that brought complex visibility to Latina LGBTQ experience to off-Broadway.

>> Don’t miss this interview with a prolific, smart and entertaining Latina writer!

Sofia’s essays have been published in such diverse venues as Ms., Blu, Fuego, 360hiphop.com, PoliticallyBlack.com and MiGente.com, and she and her work have also been profiled in major publications like the New York Post, the New York Daily News, the New York Times, ColorLines, Latina, and Upscale. Sofía is represented by Avenue A Literry and is regularly invited to speak and perform at colleges and universities throughout the United States via her speakers’ bureau SpeakOut, the country’s only national not-for-profit organization that promotes progressive speakers and artists on campuses and in communities.

Learn more about Sofia and her projects at: www.sisteroutsider.biz, www.blackartemis.com, and www.chicaluna.com.

The Importance of La Hermana in Our Lives

This month’s theme is La Hermana and for women, a sister is one of the most important things that they can have in their lives. Whether it is a blood sister or a soul sister, the women in our lives offer us love, support and understanding through both the good and bad times.

This is especially true for writers who engage in what is basically a solitary craft. Unlike other professions, a writer’s life generally consists of working alone for many long hours. Even after the production of your written work, it is sometimes difficult to share that work with others because it is something very personal to so many writers. Writers fear rejection of their work for that reason, but writing is a profession where rejection is a regular part of the business.

That’s where La Hermana comes into the picture. Your hermana will understand that fear and help you deal with it. She will be the one who reads your work and tells you that maybe it needs a little more polishing. She will be by your side as you place your baby into an envelope and mail it out to the cold cruel world. She will be the one you call after that first rejection and the first one to hear that you sold your work. Without a doubt she will be the first one in line, clutching your book in her hands, at your first signing.

But what if you don’t have a hermana in your life who can understand you as a writer? How do you get one?

There are quite a number of national and local writing organizations which aspiring and/or published authors may join. Some are genre specific while others are broader in scope. For example, I am a member of the Liberty States Fiction Writers as well as NuncaSola, an online group of Latino writers. Such groups meet regularly and it’s good to attend those meetings and network. Possibly even find critique partners who will help you improve your work. Your local library or bookstore may have similar groups which meet at their facilities.

You may find your writing hermanas this way and get the support that you need on your road to publication. Just because writing is a solitary craft doesn’t mean that you have to go it alone. I’ve been blessed to have mi hermanita Carmen and also some incredible women who have become my writing sisters. They have helped keep me going through both good times and bad in my personal life and career. I hope you have such hermanas in your life!

***

The winner of a copy of DEVOTION CALLS from the last blog is Mayra Calvani! Mayra send your postal address to me at caridadpineiro @ gmail dot com.

Join me on November 26^th for a discussion on including La Hermana in our Latino stories and a contest to win a copy of Julia Amante’s amazing EVENINGS AT THE ARGENTINE CLUB.

Latina Leadership Lessons: Building Alliances

As we all know, building a support team around you is key to your success. That support team might have a number of different kinds of members in it. We have women around us to help us, support us, and give us advice on everything from fashion to mothering to relationships to career. And our “mentors” (formal or not) are often made up of lots of different people — not just women and not just Latinas.

I will readily admit that my strongest career mentors have been older white men. That’s not because I didn’t want Latina mentors. Rather, they weren’t there (at that certain place and time) and others were willing to help me “learn the ropes.” And, let me tell you, I am so grateful to them!

We take our advice and counsel from those who can (and are willing!) to help us. Building those alliances and forging bridges is important. At the same time, when I am truly curious about what is possible and how to navigate challenges of the kind that are unique to me, I want to hear from other Latina women.

Those Latinas who have gone before, been incredibly successful (in all areas of their lives,) and learned the lessons are the ones I look up to and want to emulate. I can learn lessons from others, but I can never be anything other than what I am — a Latina. This is, of course, in part why I started the PowerfulLatinas website.

And this is also why the support organizations that bring together Latinas to learn from, and build together, are so important. I have been a member of a number of these organizations, but let me highlight one right now (more later).

This past week I was at the National Hispana Leadership Institute’s Executive Leadership Training Conference. For those of you unfamiliar with NHLI, NHLI is the only national leadership development program in the United States focused on future Latina leaders.

They have an amazing executive leadership program, but they do so much more! Like other Latina networking, business and social community organizations, they bring together wonderful women to share their stories, motivate and inspire each other, and provide mentors to the younger generation coming up. I was so impressed with the caliber of Latina professionals I met at the conference and the work they are doing (you’ll be hearing more about these individuals in the upcoming weeks).

I was also moved by the strength of the camaraderie between the women. The women call each other “sisters” and they treat each other as such — with warmth, caring and (not a little dose of!) humor. :)

And, in spite of the fact that this was my first NHLI conference, I was (as were others) warmly received, welcomed and brought into the fold.

This is the true sense of sisterhood. When we can go into groups of Latina women, appreciate what each of us brings, celebrate and honor it (and each other!), it builds a stronger community for EVERYONE.

Adelante, mujeres!

To learn more about this amazing organization, go to: www.nhli.org and read about their programs and all the ways you can get involved.

Sisters are friends for life

Growing together, sharing, competing, quarrelling, crying and laughing: sisters have something unique that no other kind of bond can duplicate. Your sister is the one that shares your blood, your infancy, your first habits, your history, your first experiences of happiness and sorrows. Therefore, she brings some means of companionship that no other connection can replicate. Parents might pass away, men in your life might leave, children grow ad try their wings but sisters are always there for you.

A sister is the woman that you both love and sometimes hate, the only person that you can not fool, and your competition that will eventually become your strongest relationship. She is your mirror and your complement, the best friend that you can not get rid of, a gift of life, a friend to the soul.

She is the teacher that will not lie, the one that will teach you what everybody else is hiding from you, the only one that will understand when nobody else does, and the one that will stand next to you and make you invincible.

You and your sister grow together side by side; you learn to confide in each other while at the same time both discover boundaries.  You protect each other, feel secure and never lonely. And yet at the same time you both learn to deal with betrayal, frustration and then reparation and forgiveness.  Very few other relationships teach as much, very few can survive the roller coaster of emotions and even less can forge such a strong and everlasting bond.  Sisters are forever.

 

Spanish Version:

 

A los hermanos… no se los escoge

 

¡Qué rápido se olvida lo bien que se pasaban aquellas tardes lluviosas cuando no había nada que hacer y sin embargo, en compañía de los hermanos, uno se divertía tanto! Igualmente ¿cómo se puede dejar de lado la camaradería de las travesuras infantiles, las memorias compartidas, las lágrimas y risas por vivencias familiares que solamente los hermanos pueden recordar? ¿Cómo olvidar el lenguaje secreto que utilizaban los niños cuando llegaban visitas no deseadas o cuando mamá obligaba a comer aquella comida intragable pero que era tan maravillosa para la salud?

Graciela no es la excepción. Tiene seis hermanos y siempre han tenido una buena relación. Pero desde que su madre falleció y cada quien se fue casando, construyendo sus propias familias y mudándose a distintas ciudades, la relación se ha ido distanciando y enfriando. La lejanía los ha hecho un poco extraños en sus vidas diarias.

Paco, el hermano menor, decidió visitar a Graciela y a Marisol, la hermana mayor, a quienes no había visto desde hace tres años. Llegó muy contento con un auto que acababa de comprar y deseaba lucirlo frente a sus hermanas. Quería mostrarles lo bien que le estaba yendo en su nuevo trabajo. Los hermanos se reencontraron con grandes abrazos y compartieron gratos recuerdos. Graciela cocinó un rico guisado que recordaba a la comida de su madre y Marisol trajo un pastel hecho por su hija especialmente para su tío. Pasaron una tarde muy feliz.

Desafortunadamente la felicidad no duró mucho. A la mañana siguiente cuando Paco llevó a Graciela al trabajo en su auto, una patrulla los detuvo y acusaron a Paco de manejar un auto robado. Lo arrestaron inmediatamente. Paco insistió en que él le había comprado el auto a su compadre de buena fe. Sin embargo, éste último tenía el teléfono desconectado y nadie pudo localizarlo.

Graciela estaba desolada. Tenía ahorrado un dinero que lo había guardado para el día en que su hija se casara. Pero se trataba de su hermano, aquel que la había protegido de los niños peleadores, que le solía rogar a su padre que no castigara a su hermana por sus travesuras, el que la había acompañado todas las mañanas a pie a la escuela y con el cual compartía un fuerte lazo sanguíneo. Graciela creía en su inocencia y haría todo lo que estuviera a su alcance para ayudarlo. Por eso fue inmediatamente a pedir asistencia a sus hermanos. Quería que entre todos contrataran a un buen abogado para representarlo.

Grande fue su sorpresa cuando sus hermanos se negaron a ayudar. Cada uno tenía sus motivos, desde tener que atender a sus propios problemas hasta cuestionar la integridad de Paco. Incluso, uno de ellos le aconsejó a Graciela que continuara con su propia vida y no se enredara en los problemas ajenos.

Con mucha tristeza Graciela se preguntó a donde habían ido parar todos los años compartidos y que significaba ser hermanos…

 

Recetas para la Vida™

Hermanos, compañeros en la vida

Ingredientes:

1 taza de solidaridad

2 cubos de apoyo

3 rebanadas de perdón y entendimiento

1 manojo de lealtad

2 cucharadas de hermandad

Agregar familia e historias compartidas continuamente

Condimentos:

Gentileza, respeto, tiempo, atenciones

Modo de preparación:

1- Un hermano es más que un amigo. Los hermanos son para toda la vida y comparten historias que los amigos desconocen. Cuando se logra tener un fuerte vínculo con un hermano no es indispensable buscar un buen amigo, sin embargo, cuando se busca un amigo se espera encontrar alguien que se asemeje a un hermano.

2- Entre hermanos no hay secretos y es más fácil perdonarse. Se comunican con un lenguaje íntimo donde basta con una simple mirada para entenderse, comparten palabras que no precisan explicación y secretos que no necesitan ser mencionados. Se ayudan en periodos de crisis, celebran triunfos y comparten preocupaciones.

3- Son los más sinceros maestros en la escuela de la vida. Son los únicos que desmienten y dan un toque de realidad por más dura que ésta sea. Explican lo que los padres o maestros no se atreven a decir.

4- Hermanos y socios. Su lealtad y solidaridad hacen que los sobrinos sean como hijos propios, dándoles siempre el mejor consejo, protegiéndolos y compartiendo la responsabilidad de criarlos.

“Con un hermano te puedes pelear a muerte, sin embargo por tu hermano peleas hasta la muerte. Hubieron veces que querías vivir sin él, a pesar de que realmente no puedes vivir sin él. Un hermano es un fiel compañero por el largo camino de la vida.”

Copyright © 2008 by Recetas para La Vida. All rights reserved

Compra y colecciona las tarjetas, pídelas!

www.recetasparalavida.org recetasparalavida@gmail

Next Page »